Football Manager(2004-present) (Example of Shite)
From ARFOPEDIA
- This article is about a computer game. For the general concept, see football manager.
Football Manager was a classic football (soccer) management simulation first developed by Kevin Toms for 8-bit computers.
On the 12th February 2004, after splitting from publishers Eidos it was announced that Sports Interactive, producers of the Championship Manager game, had acquired the brand and would henceforth release their games under the "Football Manager" name, whilst the Championship Manager series will go on, but no longer be related to Sports Interactive
Commonly known as FM 2005, the new game is one of the most hotly anticipated software releases ever, and is expected to compete directly with the first Championship Manager game to be developed by the Eidos funded Beautiful Game Studios.
It includes an updated user interface, a refined game engine, updated database and competition rules, pre- and post-match information, light and dark side force powers, international player news, cup summary news, 2D clips from agents, coach reports on squads, job centre for non-playing positions, the ability to become an Oxen, mutual contract termination, the option to send your players to Switzerland for voluntary euthanasia, enhanced player loan options, manager "mind games" and various other features; few of which are original, and none of which add an ounce of enjoyment to the game.
Further Enhancements are penciled in for the 2006 release of Football Manager. Features being touted by SIgames include the ability to praise or criticize your whole team, have a blow-drier-treatment half-time-team-talk, and punch other managers in the cunt. Head of the Cunt department, Dr Dang Ravell spoke to the Islington Herald saying; "I am fully confident that she was of legal age." "I have nothing further to add," he added.
Football Manager 2005 was released on November 4th 2004 and became the 50th fastest selling PC game of all time (according to Eurogamer.net), just behind INCESTAHOLIC, Lifeboat of the Champions and Pole Dancing Manager 05.
Sadly the makers thought better of including an option to wish AIDS on Sam Allardyce. This is yet another example of Sports Interactive shitting on the cornflakes of their loyal fans.
The website of designers Sports Interactive has messageboard forums run by trained (?) chimps. Furthermore, rumour has it that Sports Interactive hired a downs syndrome child to carry out their PR functions. While this impressed many, the efforts of Miles Jacobson actually alienated further fans of the game who didn't appreciate being treated like simpletons. Piracy has long been a problem for Sports Interactive, and never moreso than with the release of FM05. Miles Jacobson, mild mannered PR guru was heard to remark "OMGWTF I'LL STEAL YOUR CAR SEE HOW YOU LIKE IT".
Bad news piracy fans, Sports Interactive have rather insensitively released a bug-fixing patch which, when installed, completely ruins the effects of your game cracks. Miles was unavailable for comment.
The game includes a unique feature which allows you to edit the commentary to include racist slurs, such as "pathetic honky cracker" and "red sea marauder".
Sports Interactive actively support the sale of synthetic baby milk to starving families in Sudan.
"Football Manager" is also rhyming slang for "shite".
FUCK MILES, USE KILOMETERS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11111111111111
Contents |
[edit] Football Manager 2007
Last year's version of game, notable for the multiplayer game part being utterly shite.
Fancy a game Wicks?
No thanks.
[edit] Football Manager 2008
Latest version of game, notable for almost the entire game part being utterly shite.
[edit] List of Leagues included in FM2005
- Country - Levels/Divisions
- Argentina - 2/2
- Australia - 1/1
- Austria - 2/2
- Belarus - 3/3
- Belgium - 3/4
- Bhutan - 1/1
- Brazil - 3/18 even though it's RUBBISH. Mainly for fat rejects not good enough for europe tbh
- Bulgaria - 2/2
- Spooktopia - 2/3
- Chile - 2/4
- China - 2/2
- Colombia - 2/2
- Croatia - 2/3
- Czech R. - 2/2
- C4 3PM - 15/1
- Denmark - 3/3
- England - 6/7
- Finland - 2/2
- France - 3/3
- Germany - 3/4
- Gookistan - 3/9
- Greece - 2/2
- Holland - 2/2
- Hong Kong - 1/1
- Hungary - 2/2
- Iceland - 2/2
- India - 1/1
- Indonesia - 2/3
- Ireland - 2/2
- Israel - 2/2
- Italy - 4/7
- Malayasia - 2/3
- Mexico - 2/2
- N.Ireland - 2/2
- Norway - 3/6
- Obstobstobenomoria - 4/15
- Peru - 1/1
- Poland - 2/2
- Portugal - 3/5
- Punchcunt - 2/2
- Romania - 2/4
- Ruritania - 1/1
- Russia - 2/2
- Scotland - 4/4
- Serb&Mont - 2/3
- Singapore - 1/1
- Slovakia - 2/2
- Slovenia - 2/2
- Outer Niggerea - 6/9
- S. Africa - 2/2
- S. Korea - 2/2
- Spain - 3/6
- Sweden - 3/8
- Switz - 2/2
- Turkey - 3/5
- Ukraine - 2/2
- Uruguay - 2/2
- US Vrg Is - 1/1
- USA - 1/1
- Wales - 1/1
