Bullseye

From ARFOPEDIA

Basically the best game show in the world ever. Hosted by Jim Bowen and aided by Tony Green, the show basically made Sunday afternoons bearable in the 80's.

The show had several different rounds all revolving around the throwing of arrows at a dartboard, here is a brief summary of the various segments of the show.

[edit] JIM'S BANTER

"It says here you're a plumber, have you always had these pipe dreams?"

Opening to the show where genial host would warm the audience up with a few one liners and then meet the contestants, 3 teams of 2 people, one dart thrower and one to answer the questions. At least 2 of the teams were required by law to be from Yorkshire, or YTV as jim would call it, at least 2 men would be sporting moustaches and any team consisting of 2 females would always be referred by jim as "a bit of glamour for the show" even when rough as fuck.

[edit] ROUND ONE - SUBJECTS BOARD

The subjects board, more guelling than being interrogated by the Nazis

First round would consist of a dartboard split into various quiz catagories, such as politics, literature and affairs, though no-one ever went for affairs. the dart player would try to hit a subject nominated by his team mate, who would then need to answer the question correctly to win a cash prize. At the end of 3 rounds of this the contestants with the least money were eliminated from the show.

[edit] ROUND TWO - GENERAL KNOWLEDGE

The 2 remaining darts players throw 3 darts each at the board, the highest score earning his teamamte a question to answer for the amount scored by the darts player. Again at the end of the round one team was eliminated.

[edit] AD BREAK

A necessary evil as jim needed a bit of a break to count some money out for the team finishing in second place.

[edit] PROFESSIONAL CHARITY THROW

We come out of the ad breaks with a celebrity darts players playing for the charity of the final contestants choice. Pro had 9 darts to score 301 or more, if this magic target was reached the amount destined for charity ewould be doubled. Usually a male darts pro such as Eric Bristow or Keith Dellor would be the ones throwing, if the contestants were unlucky they had a male celebrity, female pro or worst of all a female celebrity throwing for them. But it was only for charity so who cares.

[edit] BULLY'S PRIZE BOARD

IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIN ONE.....Nothing phoney about this prize, it's a filntstones novelty phone

Dart board split up into 8 sections, behind each one a prize for the contestants to aim for, with a special Bully's prize hiding behind the bullseye. Prizes included such things as a Sony Walkman, matching his and hers pens, Goblin teasmaids and the obligitary decanter set. Contestants had 9 darts to win as many prizes as they could, with the dart player getting 6 darts and the non-dart player just the 3.

[edit] TO GAMBLE OR NOT TO GAMBLE

The Bendy Bully, more sought after than the nobel prize

Once the prize board round was over contestants were then faced with a difficult choice - should they keep the prizes they had just won or gamble them for the chance of winning Bully's star prize - basically a speedboat, car or occasionally a kitchen. Contestants had the time it took for the board to turn round to make ther decision. If they decided they had had a lovely day and wanted to keep their prizes the option of gambling would be given to the 2nd and then if necessary 3rd placed teams. These teams, without the benefit of prizes to gamble would be forfeiting the winnings they'd accumulated in early rounds, leaving them with nothing to show for their day save their Bendy Bullys and BFH.

[edit] FINAL ROUND

Assuming at least one team wasnt a bottling coward we would be on to the final round. Each player had 3 darts each with the aim being to score 101 or more with 6 darts or less. Regardless of whether they won or lost contestants were then shown the prize on offer at the end of the show.

[edit] STARS OF THE SHOW

Jim Bowen - loveable old racist from Blackburn, the host with the most. widowed husband of the late Queen Mother

Catchphrases:

• lovely smashing super

• lets take a look at what you would have won

• you have the time it takes for the board to revolve

• You've won 40 pounds, I've 20 here, I'll count out the rest during the break

Tony Green - portly darts scorer who was one of the staple ingrediants of the Embassy World Darts Championship. Member of Ricky Gervais's PEN 15 club.

Catchphrases:

• INNNNNNNNNNN ONE

• INNNNNNNNNNN TWO

• INNNNNNNNNNN THREE

• INNNNNNNNNNN FOUR

• INNNNNNNNNNN FIVE

• INNNNNNNNNNN SIX

• INNNNNNNNNNN SEVEN

• INNNNNNNNNNN EIGHT

• AND BULLLLLLY'S SPECIAL PRIIIIIIIIIIIIIZE

Bully - cartoon animal who featured in the opening credits as well as the occasional fleeting appearance during the show itself, most memorably whenever a contestant ran out of time to answer a question. made famous by the legendary bendy bully, a soft foam toy in his image

Bully, pictured looking especially smug during the intro

Catchphrases:

• MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

[edit] GLOSSARY

BFH - Bus Fare Home