Big Geordie

From ARFOPEDIA

This page has been rated B@thwank

BG is a massive sh1tehawk who uses OTF, purely for posting about the latest news headline, which gives him reason to cry about the state of the world today . He famously has a metal plate in his face, which locals believe to be a sign he is in fact a robot, because no human could possibly bleat and moan as much as this cock. The operation to insert this metal plate is thought to have reduced his brain capacity to only allow two trains of thought: "social decline" and "fat women." In 2005 he was bullied by a girl, causing him to take his life off work. He also has a stepson who once changed the password on his computer to "cunt". Definitly homophobic but at the same time strongly opposed to the use of the word spastic. The Spastic. Believed to be an enemy of the Queen.

Made a martyr of his old username and returned a few weeks later under the alias of Roj Blake in an attempt to prove that the abuse he received was directed at the username rather than what he actually posted. This was a spectacular failure, mainly due to the fact that he posted in exactly the same manner under the new username and was met with exactly the same kind of response.

"Big Geordie" is also rhyming slang for "sh1te".

Contents 1 Famous BG Quotes 2 BG's opinions on fan loyalty 3 BG'S Pros & Cons 4 Famous BG Threads 5 BG's Trademark Swear Filter Workaroundsâ„¢

Famous BG Quotes

• "It was Steve Foobooley having a pop at me for being an ex-Sun reader - at least thats the way I took it - a lack of smiley's after his posting didn't show the intent of how it was meant. Perhaps it was too strong - what I said. It's just it boils my pi55 when folk make hoy-away remarks about something which affects a great many people."

• "I'm of the opinion that smoking shouldn't be allowed in public places, either. Those who choose to light up in such places are making a choice - people who don't smoke that happen to be around them (for any reason) don't have a choice, of not to breath in that smoke. I mean, would it be resonable for me to have a drink, and then go and pi55 all over someone, or in their mouth (and no, I haven't seen any of those films :p ), because it is exactly the same thing, IMO."

• "Take it from me - sometimes you cannot turn tail and run off. You face a choice - to be a doormat and take it - let little $hithouses walk all over you for the rest of your life, or you make a stand. It's people who make a stand who will change things - not liberal do-gooders. It's maybe because of these left-wingers that this county is in such a social mess, today."

• "Seriously, as regards the holocaust - I think it's more down to a lack of education with regards to younger people - which is a massive shame. Then again, if bairns were taught about the holocaust and the suffering, I'm sure the PC brigade would be up in arms."

• "Well, anyone gonna admit to still doing it ? Seriously, I can put my hand on my heart and say that I haven't bought a jazz mag since I was 18 (think it was Men Only), but then again, p0rn does seem to be more readily available, with the immergence of the internet. I remember my mate Ian, had a canny collection when we were in our teens - goes without saying that it used to fill one of those big old adidas sports bags ! Must have been a few quids worth for sure !"

• "Anyway, I'm feeling ropey today - full of cold, feel knackerd and generallu naff - so, I thought I'd cheer myself up and post a thread with some pics of the very bonnie, Amanda Lamb - presenter of Channel 4's 'A Place in the Sun'."

• "I couldn't believe it when I was watching the highlights on ITV last night. Mssrs Pleat and Champion seemed almost 'angry' that Given hadn't been dismissed for the penalty (which I thought was debatable, and still do). Worst of all though, was the dig at Shearer - first question they asked him, was about his 'first goal from open play in the CL', which you can see from above, is bo11ocks. :mad: If I was Alan, I'd have grabbed the mic and shoved it up the interviers @rse. Then again, he would have probably liked it, as ITV get involved in plenty of arselick/brown nosing when it comes to Man Yoo. "

• "Awww man "

• "Boils my p155 man "

• "oot on the hoy man"

• "Poor bairns "

• "Sh1tehawk "

• "I wonder who it is who looks after my page on that wiki ? I'd guess it's Wicom with FBT reporting back to him after trawling through all of my posts."

• "A lot of these vids are available if you know where to look and it needn't cost you a bean."
  (A bean? A BEAN? A FUCKING BEAN? Is this the year 1412? - Ed)

• "Their football (CL) coverage would be OK, if they'd get shot of Red Clive and David 'Shimbomba' Pleat. Also the an@l lickfest over the top 4 is as irksome as the BBC."
  (Baffled as to why any human would think anal would need censoring - Ed)

• "Sylvestre would do a job for us, alongside Taylor. He comes with a boatload of experience. and he's still at a good age (29-30 IIRC)."
  (More fool you - Ed)

• "In general, the fashion industry has a lot to answer for here. Of course, the fact that many fashion designers are gay and like their models to look like little boys, has nothing to do with it. Thumbs Down."

• "The way the club is set up at the moment - staff, coaches and players is rotten. We should carry this advert;
  
  "Facing Relegation ?
  Haven't scored an away goal in a long time ?
  Need 3 points to help your cause ?
  Don't worry - Newcastle United will help you out""

• "My guts are pretty much always on fire. Again - it depends on what I eat."

• "Perhaps in the real scheme of things we are pretty much pond life (with an appetite for self destruction) at the moment. An advanced civilisation would have little to gain by contacting us.

Perhaps though they are already here and there is some sort of cover-up to hide their existance ? Questions we'll never find the answers to unfortunately.

I reckon that scientists/governments will know now (and have done for some time) that life on other world's exists. Perhaps what they have been doing (like the stories of water on Mars) is leaking little tit-bits now and then to ready people for when they do admit the truth. Even then, it'll still come as a massive culture shock, with religion standing to have the most to lose."

• "Good job were not all racist then eh ? Or perhaps many users are, but haven't got the ba11s to show it because they know they'll be booted out of this place quicker than $hit off a stick."
  (yes, he actually censored the word balls too - Ed)

• "Michael - I think Ameobi might get more games than you think. You are harsh on him, I feel - he has got a superb touch for a big lad."

• "Michael - I think Ameobi might get more games than you think. You are harsh on him, I feel - he has got a superb touch for a big lad."

• "Michael - I think Ameobi might get more games than you think. You are harsh on him, I feel - he has got a superb touch for a big lad."

• "Michael - I think Ameobi might get more games than you think. You are harsh on him, I feel - he has got a superb touch for a big lad."

• "Michael - I think Ameobi might get more games than you think. You are harsh on him, I feel - he has got a superb touch for a big lad."

• "You don't have to privatise the NHS to get rid of all of the bu11shit what goes on."
  (bu11shit what goes on WHAT - and that's not to mention the most retarded censorship EVER - Ed)

• "It's not beyond the realms of possibility that the answer lies beyond human understanding at the present time."

• "I'm just about to head off to my crib. Had a canny day out Urbexing, so it's been a good'un." (honestly this one is real - Ed)

• "Should we lose to the mackems next week (which would be out first defeat on Wearside for 27 years), the heat will really be on Fat Sam. Sure we have 17 points, but at no point this season has the football been good to watch."

• "I guess as ever it's a judgement call - but is it not our duty to stand up to unreasonable behaviour ?"
  (from the man who sat back and did nothing whilst being bullied at work by A FUCKING WOMAN, and who got his head caved in last time he tried to stand up to anyone - Ed)

• "The media also have to be held to account - they roll out the same tired old cliches and soundbites about how the 'players aren't going to let the country down, etc'. Only too willing to talk the talk, but not able to walk the walk."

• "Performance of the season - without a doubt. And stuffing a London club on their own patch. Thats one in the eye for Fleet Street, from KK and Newcastle United."

• "Is the rise [in petrol prices] to drive the poorer motorists off the road so driving becomes a something that is only enjoyed by the more well off?"

• "I'm not so sure. Dennis Wise will be behind this - he's running the club at the moment, for all intensive purposes"

• "Kinnear is hardly going to get supporters behind the club again though is it? The club has managed to pretty much disenfranchise a large section of it's support and the next appointment is critical for me. Get it wrong and a lot of people will walk away - maybe for good, including hardcore fans - not just the johnny-come-latelys."

• "A music legend of his time, but something just isn't/wasn't right about the man despite the 'not guilty' verdict. If he has died, I hope it was quick and pain-free."

• "Who does Keith Harris work for, or should I say 'on behalf of'?"

• "Not even The Special One could have kept this lot up, IMO... Had Shearer come in back in January when Kinnear had his heart problem, then we might have had a chance. As it is, Ashley stupidly waited for 2 months before getting Shearer in."

BG's opinions on fan loyalty

• "I do wonder (seriously) where all of the Leeds fans have disappeared to, from this board ? When they were doing well, there were plenty of them knocking about. Since things have turned downwards for them - most have buggered off ! Thats what pi55es me off about some 'fans' - supporting your side is about the bad times, as well as the good time - something which I've been through as a Newcastle fan."

• "My point is that as long as fans keep pumping money into Ashley's pockets, then nothing has to change. Thats how it was under Seymour (after KK retired as a player) and McKeag. When are you lads going to say enough is enough (serious question)?"

• "As for keeping on going - it's a tough one, but as long as the cash keeps on rolling into the club from s/t's then Ashley can keep things going as they are. It's what's happened for years - certainly since the end of WWII. The club has been used as a cash cow by those that run it. It's probably one of the main reasons as to why we have underachieved for so long. The potential of the club is huge - whoever gets it right in the future will play to full houses, as we did under SBR. Until then, people are just going to keep walking away because they are fed up of being taken for granted. Even if I could afford a s/t (which I can't at the moment, with the little'un) - I wouldn't renew."

BG'S Pros & Cons

Pros

• Strong back
• Robot
• Collection of 2000 parkas
• Cache of weapons
• Dislikes Titus Bramble ("$hitus Bramw@nk")
• Knows himself as a man

Cons

• Too soft for his own good
• Cunt
• Is a Geordie
• Insufferable wretch
• Cannot be trusted
• 
• Boring clown
• Bleats like a fucking sheep
• Likes all sorts of $hite
• Insufferable wretch
• Muses
• Ridiculous overuse and misuse of parenthesis
• Insufferable wretch

Famous BG Threads

• Female football commentators - yes or no ?
• Your favourite superhero and why ?
• Can ayone recommend some celtic chillout music ?
• Anyone else got post Xmas gut-rot ?
• Do you 'drink and drive'
• The Lion, The Witch and The Wardrobe
• How would you respond to hearing racist comments, whilst at the match ?
• Just watched a good BEEF film ' Saints and Soldiers'
• Government to go after the work-shy
• Have you started going grey yet ?
• The worst injury crisis that you have known at your club during your time supporting them ?
• Have/would you ever lay your hands on a woman ?
• Musings from Football 365's John Nicholson
• Is Yahoo spam reporting as gash as it appears to be ?
• 'Deliverance' on TCM - any good ?
• The Subways - anyone know much about them ?
• Did you ever have a teacher who looked like this at school ?
• Some good news on the family front for a change
• Kelvin MacKenzie reopening old wounds....
• Can anyone recommend a new car for me ?
• More car assistance - getting a two from a garage
• Anyone remember 'Morph' ?
• What is wrong with English sport ? (possible rugby/ashes spoilers)
• Severe gales and storms set to batter the UK
• Rupert Murdoch - most powerful man in the UK ?
• Rinsing/washing a car engine with water (car engine experts required)
• Panini stickers - for lads of a certain age (ie over 30) !
• Question for those with wives and girlfriends - your relationship and p0rn
• Social ettiquete when out with the lads, on the beer
• The first blast of winter due to hit the UK this week
• Why do you support the club you do, and what do you get from it ?
• It can only happen in Sunderland....
• This Farepak Christmas hamper business
• Any more fireworks going off where you live tonight ?
• Self doubt
• Are you part of a clique on OTF ?
• ITV = rubbish
• Concerns about the step-son
• Specialised positions or square pegs in round holes ?
• One for Retro (and those that love a little bit of toilet humour)
• Notorious films *a list of those that were banned in years gone by*
• Influential posters on OTF
• The perfect female body shape/look - OTF decides.....
• The next big thing to come through the ranks at your club ? *the one to watch thread*
• How clubs/FA's treat their fans - a global question
• People who leave games early
• Your views on 'Chelsea Tractors'
• Natural born footballers - that you have seen 'live' for your side ?
• Ever tried 'dowsing' before ?
• The latest ITN News investigation - how safe is your teenager, online ?
• Richard Scudamore shows his true colours - Only the Top 4 matter
• Do we live in too clean/sanitised a world, today ? (germs/bacteria)
• Now that Doctor Who has made a successful comeback, which other sci-fi show(s) should return ?
• Scariest horror film ?
• Victoria Beckham - who cares ?
• Is there an under-class in Britain ?
• Craziest/Daftest thing you've seen at a football game ?
• The baiting language used on OTF
• Can fear (as an emotion) be a good thing in children ?
• Watch out David Icke - MI5 whistleblower David Shayler is after your crown !
• Warmest day of the years so far - Ant Attack !
• Now that Doctor Who has made a successful comeback, which other sci-fi show(s) should return ?
• Chris Langham found guilty of downloading child p0rn
• Hows the weather where you are today
• As you get older does your taste in women change ?
• The English National Anthem
• Going to the match, drunk - why ?
• Spying scandal uncovered at Newcastle United
• Dou you believe in the human soul ?
• Your posting style- a self critque
• Would you stand up to a group of yobs ?
• How would you save English football ?
• Footballers - on the field behaviour and a lack of professionalism
• Anyone know much about lymph nodes/glands?
• Any IFA's on here? Life Assurance/Insurance
• Anyone here have a cleaner? Question if so....
• Question for SKY users
• Are you much of a person for shedding tears?
• Wireless keboard and mouse - any good?

• Wireless USB adapters - any good?

• Question on car seatbelts
• What would have happened if Germany won WWII?
• 7/7 bombers appear to have received funding from Children in Need

• Do you give blood?

• My baby blog
• Youngsters and knife crime
• Will there ever be a black British prime minister?
• Will you be buying a poppy?
• To have the snip or not to have the snip?
• Will we ever see an Shearer-type English centre-forward again?
• Extreme Shepherding

BG's Trademark Swear Filter Workaroundsâ„¢

• sh!t
• sh1te
• pr∫ck
• cr@p
• @r$e
• n199€r
• ©μnt
• tVV@t
• ©0©k 90ßß1€®
• ©☻☻N
• cunâ„¢aze
• Ğ®€Ğ ©@®†Ë®
• Menswe@r
• w¤¤¤¤r
• b@thwank - (not making this shit up, he actually did censor the word bath instead of wank)