Andy Gray
From ARFOPEDIA
Has fallen off according to some. More astute observers, however, maintain that he has always been a hopelessly clueless cunt.
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[edit] Quotes
- "Take a bow son"
- "Let's get one thing straight..."
- "YAAAAAAAA BEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAUUUUUUUUUTTTTTTTYYYYYYYY... take a bow son"
- (just before the 2005 Carling Cup final between Chelsea and Liverpool) - "Well Richard, I think it's fair to say that Jose won't have faced a bigger match than this in his managerial career"
- "This may sound daft, but rather than say there are too many games on Sky, I think there are too many on terrestrial television.
That's the biggest difference between now and 10 years ago. There are more and more games being shown on Five, Channel 4, ITV, even BBC. The result is oversaturation. I don't know if we show any more than we used to." - "What’s amazing is that after most teams have played two games, only one has got the maximum six points. And this was a Premiership that was supposed to be so predictable…"
- "I said before the season that I fancied them (United) above anyone to challenge Chelsea and on the evidence of the opening two games I was right."
- "If England win the World Cup, it will be despite Sven, not because of him. I could name half a dozen Englishmen who could have taken the same players five years ago and not done any worse."
- "I don't think England need a foreign coach. None of the major countries have one. Any Englishman could have done as well with the he's had at his disposal for the last six years. He has underachieved.
"I have not seen him do anything to influence a game when it really mattered. I could manage England and win as many. You could. There is such talent available." - "Time and time and time again"
- "Almunia has never let Arsenal down before"
- "Forget the two away goals. With one swing of Wayne Rooney's boot on Tuesday night the whole mindset of the tie changed in an instant. The pressure has been heaped on Milan, and I believe that Milan side is ordinary.
Not only will United get a result in Italy next week, they will beat Milan in their own backyard. I think they've got the Italians running scared - they're not a great team and they know it.
Sure, Kaka is brilliant but go through the team - the keeper is dodgy and the back four is creaking and should hold no fear for United's forwards. Anything else to be scared of? Pirlo? No. Seedorf? No. Ambrosini? No. Gilardino? Definitely not. - "If he'd got that one up and over the keeper, and on target Martin, it would've been a goal."
- "Eh, senoreo, where is the fucking taxio?"
[edit] Recurring Phrases used by Gray
- "He picks up the return pass off his mate"
- "He gambles and wins a throw-in for his side"
[edit] Medical Expertise
Despite a complete lack of any form of medical training, Gray often likes to diagnose onfield injuries from his commentary position high in the stand and offer a prognosis regarding the period of absence for the injured player in question. The most memorable example of this occurred when Chelsea faced Newcastle in a 5th round FA Cup match at St. James's Park in 2005. After a nasty looking collision left Wayne Bridge requiring lengthy treatment early in the 2nd half Gray leapt at the opportunity to display his erudition: "It's an impact injury, Martin" he confidently declared, "It'll hurt; it'll hurt alright but it's nothing serious. He'll be back in a week I should think. 10 days, tops."
It soon transpired that Bridge had in fact broken his ankle and wouldn't play again for another 10 months.
[edit] The footballing world according to Andy Gray
- The Premiership is the best in the world.
- Steven Gerrard must always play in the centre of midfield.
- It's ok that the Premier League only fined West Ham because they gave the money to charity.
- Furthermore, the offence could not have resulted in a points deduction because Tevez was a registered West Ham player. This is in spite of the fact that the Premier League's judgement stated "We repeat we do take these breaches as being extremely serious. They could have merited a points deduction, and thus the financial penalty must reflect that".
